“Do not fear the leaves changing for it is leading to the best season of your life yet.” - Jennae Cecelia

Life Cycles and Other Random Thoughts

Life cycles are kind of cool if you think about it. I know that is random but stay with me for a

minute. We have been talking about seeds and being planted, not buried, dreams and the like for

a couple of weeks. Today I want to do a little bit of an origin story. Do you remember being a

little kid and planting the bean in a cup at school? You planted it just so, sat it in the window and

watched for the first signs of life. It was so exciting to see that first little sign of green and then it

seemed to explode out of the cup. Remember that feeling, like you had somehow just watched a

miracle? Well today we are going a layer deeper. Your curriculum chose the bean because it has

a relatively short germination period. Had they chosen an avocado seed, you would have

forgotten the experiment and moved onto the next grade level before the first root appeared.

Trust me, it’s a timing thing for very short attention spans.

Let’s go back to the bean. When your stubby little child fingers poked a hole in the dirt in

that cup and dropped that seed into it, that little bean had everything it needed to sprout, grow

and eventually create more beans for more dinners and more experiments. But lots had to happen

in the dark. The first phase of plant growth is called germination, but the technical stuff isn’t the

focus. The point is before the seed reaches the embryo stage, lots of activity happens. Cells are

splitting and multiplying. The seed readies itself to sprout, the shell softens and the tiniest

emergence of a root and stem system forms. As the root and stem system strengthens and grows,

the seed coat softens, and splits allowing the growing stem to lengthen and begin to force its way

upward toward the warmth of the sun. The roots are still digging deep and drinking in the

nutrients in the soil and water, but you cannot see all this activity taking place. It is all beneath

the surface. It looks like nothing is happening at all from our perspective, but the little seed is

working and expending energy and growing. It is getting stronger in the darkness. It is preparing

for the time of emergence and its time to shine. So, just as the child is ready to give up and toss

the cup out with the trash, the little spec of green appears and then the whole plant takes off! You

might wonder where I am going with this little science lesson, but I needed to reflect on this for

just a moment. You see, we are like those little beans. We all have seeds of dreams and

ambitions and ideas that we want to see happen. We all drift into our own thoughts sometimes

and wonder what it would be like to… fill in the blank. For me, I have wanted to take the lessons

I learned through my divorce and the aftermath and help other women avoid some of the

mistakes I made, kind of shorten their learning curve a bit. For my daughter, she wanted to start a

photography business. She has always had a creative eye and loved showing people how she sees

them. For you, it may be writing a book, or starting that catering company or creating and selling

art. I have no idea, but I know you have a dream and I know that the seed of that dream has all

that it needs to grow and come to fruition contained inside you. It just needs the sun and the soil

to germinate and grow.

Sounds easy enough, but it isn’t easy at all. Some dreams can come true pretty quickly,

they have short germination times. Like most herbs germinate within 20 days, some dreams can

happen within a couple of weeks. You can create that webpage, start a social media group, make

your first sale, take all those first steps. But some dreams are like avocado seeds. It can take three

to six months to germinate. That is a long time in the seed world and that is only reaching the

most vulnerable stage of becoming public. Once the roots appear, it still has to grow beyond the

seed shell and fight through the elements that can destroy it before it ever gets started. Do you

sometimes feel like that? Whatever your dream may be, let it develop in the dark. Give it the

nutrients and warmth that it needs but give it time also. That is the hard part. Like the child who

wants to toss the cup in the trash because they can’t see the progress, you have to resist the urge

to toss your dream in the trash. This is the testing period for you. How badly do you want this

dream? Is it worth the wait? Is it worth the work and are you strong enough to push through it

and sit in the darkness waiting for it to burst through the soil? Only you can answer that question.

For me, my dream sat with me like a dried bean for over ten years. I coached women and I

walked them through some hard events, but I never put the effort into actually creating a safe

space where women could easily find help from a trusted source. I was afraid of being

challenged. I was afraid of being judged and I was afraid of what people would say. When my

late husband chose hospice, he asked me a question that changed all of that. He looked me in the

eyes and said, “how many girls are being abused and staying in situations like you were in

because they don’t know where to go? You can help them, and you aren’t doing it because you

worry about what people will say”. Ouch! Funny how realizing you have reached the end of your

time on this side of eternity brings such clarity to how someone you love is wasting theirs. He

was challenging me to step out and create that safe space. Soon after that, I planted my bean. It is

still germinating, splitting, and growing. I can see the beginnings of a root system, but it is still

fighting through the seed coat, strengthening, and expanding.

My daughter’s photography business turned two years old today. She had allowed her

dream to be stifled by pressures from well-meaning friends and adults telling her the odds of

making it professionally were dismal at best. The first year she had her camera, she focused on

learning her craft and had fifteen sessions. She studied, practiced, and pushed on closed doors

until she got responses. In her first year of business, she engaged with 49 clients. Last year, she

captured memories of over 70 families, was recognized as an up-and-coming area photographer

and financed several projects she had dreamed of doing. She created beautiful memories of

family vacations, intimate weddings, newborns, engagements, senior portraits, and girls’ trips.

She was trusted with once-in-a-lifetime events for her clients, and she treated each session like it

was her own precious event. She truly pours her heart into every encounter, but a couple of

sessions really stood out. For one, it was a simple family vacation with a couple laughing, and

children who were obviously the center of their world. Within weeks of returning home the

husband suddenly died, leaving his family stunned, with only memories. The other was a family

enjoying the last vacation with a precious mom and grandmother who knew her time was short.

Those photos are precious reminders of people in our lives and the moments of joy shared with

them. My daughter’s dream has burst forth and is growing and thriving because she didn’t toss

her cup when it was quietly growing in the darkness.

Today, I am urging you to find those dreams and let them settle into your heart. Take a

few steps and plant the bean. Someone somewhere needs your dream. They need your gift, and

they need your voice. Think about it, the bean does all that work to sprout, create more beans to

nourish us. Their stalks and stems can be replanted, decompose, and nourish the soil for other

plants to thrive. It isn’t about the bean; it is the gift to others that ultimately matters. So, gather

your thoughts and humor me with this exercise.

1. Write down the three things that keep nagging at you. The more out there, the better.

Those are the dreams that you and only you can do. This is for your eyes only, so no

holding back. Wanna write a novel? Want to open a storefront? Whatever…

a. ________________________________________________________________

b. ________________________________________________________________

c. ________________________________________________________________

2. For each of the three things listed above, write down five possibilities for making it

happen. Timelines and money do not matter at this point, just write down how this could

possibly happen and who you would help. Spend some time on this part. See the faces of

the people you would be helping or supporting. Thinking deeply about how it could

possibly happen and steps to start the growth in the darkness. Want to write a book?

Maybe the first step is simply writing a short Instagram post each day. Come up with five

ways to take a baby step.

a. ________________________________________________________________

b. _________________________________________________________________

c. _________________________________________________________________

d. _________________________________________________________________

e. _________________________________________________________________

3. For each of the three, write down five objections. Go wild with this one. Your family

would be so embarrassed if you wrote a steamy beach read. Or what would your friends

say about you opening a store? Your friends think you are just “playing with paint”. What

if you don’t make any sales? The objective is to get your objections out of your head and

on paper. This takes the power out of them. Think about it, so what if your friends think

you are merely a hobbyist. They aren’t your clients anyway; they are your friends. Your

objections cannot appear so large when they are out in the open for you to truly assess

and address.

a. _________________________________________________________________

b. _________________________________________________________________

c. _________________________________________________________________

d. _________________________________________________________________

e. __________________________________________________________________

4. Now for each objection, write the following and fill in the blank.

a. If I knew my gift would help\ bring joy to ____________, would I care if my

family was embarrassed? ______________________________

b. If I knew that I could not fail, would _____________’s words hold so much

power?

c. If I knew it would take a year or more to get my dream to success, would I be as

worried about what my friends thought? _____________________________

5. Finally, you get to decide it this dream needs to sit in the pantry for a while. If it isn’t the

right time, that is ok, but I want you to set a timeline for revisiting this execrcise.

a. Every three months I will__________________________________________

b. Every six months I will____________________________________________

c. By this time next year, if I still have this dream floating around in my head I

will____________________________________________________________.

That is all I have for this week, but I want you to really think about this one. We all have a

dream. Part of reclaiming your sense of self and your confidence is valuing your own worth.

That dream is there for a reason, and you are the person to do it. It doesn’t have to be grandiose,

and it doesn’t have to be complicated. It just needs to have your spin on it. There is room for all

of us to succeed. So, allow this to settle in with you. Think about it and allow the little bean in

your heart to develop in the dark. It is waiting to burst forth in the sun, just like you! Until next

time, find that special something that brings you joy and do more of it!

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